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Wake Up Call

April 22, 2007 By

I was roaming the blogosphere this morning, looking for little tidbits about the Wings – Flames games (more on that in a bit), when I found this at the Battle of Alberta:

Props again to NBC. I watched some of both networks yesterday, and I just couldn’t believe how much more enjoyable the NBC broadcast was than the CBC.

I know there are complaints about the CBC, but I am happy that even the hard fans feel NBC is doing a good job. I happen to agree that NBC is doing a good job, with a better call and good camera work. The Pierre McGuire is at the least entertaining, even though he didn’t earn any fan points from me for his performance in the Olympics.

The wakeup call should be for Versus. If they know how to change the channel, they should be tuning in to the NBC broadcasts, and look at what is working for them, and isn’t working on their own network. I would be happy to buy them the notebook and pen to take notes with.


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Filed Under: Hockey

Playoffs Make Strange Bedfellows

April 20, 2007 By

And, thanks to the strangeness that is hockey:

Good job, Flames!!!

Way to go, Dallas!!!


Now, I feel kind of dirty.

Filed Under: Uncategorized

So Long, Pens, Don’t Let the Door Hit You

April 19, 2007 By

The Penguins are going to have a long flight back to Pittsburgh tonight, as the Senators dispatched them soundly in five games, tonight’s ending with a shutout. And although I may not be jumping for joy, I will not miss them one bit.

As I search the playoffs for a few teams to get behind, a few people have suggested I look to the Penguins for a good run. For most, it has centered around the story. The Pens were about to lose their home if Pittsburgh didn’t build a new arena. They were so bad last season, and then made up enough points to finish the season fifth in the east this year. Quite a remarkable turnaround. Still, I could care less.

Is it just me, or does it feel like the Penguins didn’t really earn anything? I mean, they played good hockey, sure, but there isn’t really anything else to them. They played in a division where the Flyers were giving out points like every day was Halloween. This may sound stupid, but at the same time, here is a team that should be grabbing my attention, and they just put me off. They do absolutely nothing for me. Why?

  • Over the last four seasons, the Pens have had 2 number one draft picks, and 2 number two draft picks. Still, until this year, they didn’t do anything.

  • Marc-Andre Fleury is not a very good goaltender. Streaky doesn’t even cover it. To be a first overall pick, he sure doesn’t act like it. He had a ton of wins this season, but had fallen apart enough times and in such spectacular fashion, it was a good chance he was going to be a bust. Also, I hear he stopped signing autographs for a while, even for kids, reportedly telling a fan, “I don’t do that anymore.” If this has changed, I’d like to know.

  • I am sick to death of having Sidney Crosby shoved down my throat. I’m tired of his commercials, I’m tired of seeing little special clips about him, I am over the attention that I am expected to pay him. Why?

  • Crosby is constantly complaining, gets off the bench to argue a call or non call with the refs (without staying out for a shift), and doesn’t act like much of a leader. His interviews are boring, and he has the personality of a sock puppet. The guy has to man up, and could stand a little bit of sticking up for himself. The refs won’t do it for him, and he had better learn that fast.

I’m really happy I didn’t back them. Something didn’t feel right about it. Sure, I took a few of them in my playoff pool, because points are points, but other than that, I will not miss them one bit.

Welcome to your exit, Penguins. Apparently, I’m supposed to like you. I must have missed the memo from the league.

Filed Under: Hockey, NHL

Real Men of Genius: Standing

April 17, 2007 By

Jerseys and Hockey Love presents, Real Men of Genius.

Real Men of Genius.

Today we salute you, Mr. Obnoxious Standing Up to Be on TV Guy.

Mr. Obnoxious Standing Up to Be on TV Guy.

While your tickets may have cost 85 dollars, you’d rather have your friends see you on TV for a second.

Hey, there’s a hockey game going on.

When play passes by, you turn to the camera, blocking the view of everyone behind you.

Come on, man, sit down now.

As your image streaks by, you waive, flail and look like an asshole for no reason.

Really, sit down now.

While you dole out your 15 minutes in two second installments, everyone around you hates your guts.

I going to f**king stab you.

So enjoy yourself while you can, oh Hog of the Hockey, because your glory won’t last forever.

Mr. Obnoxious Standing Up to Be on TV Guy.

Jerseys and Hockey Love, Denver, Colorado. Please Blog responsibly.


I hope you are familiar with the Bud Light commercials called Real Men of Genius. If you listen to Phoenix Coyotes radio broadcasts, you have heard them. In fact, that’s all they play during commercial breaks. If not, you can listen to some of them here. They are pretty funny in general. There aren’t enough hockey versions though. I aim to correct that. If you don’t know, italics are the singer dude.

Filed Under: Fun, Hockey

Real Men of Genius: Suspension

April 16, 2007 By

Jerseys and Hockey Love presents, Real Men of Genius.

Real Men of Genius.

Today we salute you, Mr. Suspended Hockey Player

Mr. Suspended Hockey Player.

As nearly impossible as it is to be suspended in the NHL, you are an overachiever. Colin Campbell spun the wheel of justice and it stopped on “Busted.”

Can I buy a vowel, please.

While your team skates on the ice, you surf on your couch.

Pass me the Cheetos.

Who would have thought that Center Ice package would be put to this good of use.

I could really use a Cheeto.

1 game, 3 games, 10 or more, you join a unique club, your name cast in infamy.

Ovechkin gets away with murder.

So enjoy watching some hockey on TV, oh Duke of the Dumbass. Trust us, you’ve earned it.

Mr. Suspended Hockey Player.

Jerseys and Hockey Love, Denver, Colorado. Please Blog responsibly.


I hope you are familiar with the Bud Light commercials called Real Men of Genius. If you listen to Phoenix Coyotes radio broadcasts, you have heard them. In fact, that’s all they play during commercial breaks. If not, you can listen to some of them here. They are pretty funny in general. There aren’t enough hockey versions though. I aim to correct that. If you don’t know, italics are the singer dude.

Filed Under: Fun, Hockey

Real Men of Genius: Thrashers

April 16, 2007 By

Jerseys and Hockey Love presents, Real Men of Genius.

Real Men of Genius.

Today we salute you, Mr. Atlanta Former Number 1 Goaltender.

Mr. Atlanta Former Number 1 Goaltender.

You live in Blue land, but you are stuck in Benchedville.

I can see the whole game.

One bad goal and you, sir, are riding the pine.

Momma would be proud.

Your career, your groin, even your hair isn’t what it used to be.

Looking worse than Brian Engblom.

Losing your job to the backup isn’t so bad, at least you have your health.

Kari is a girls name.

So wear your team baseball cap proudly, oh warmer from the bench, because at least you aren’t as bad off as Marc Denis.

Mr. Atlanta Former Number 1 Goaltender.


I hope you are familiar with the Bud Light commercials called Real Men of Genius. If you listen to Phoenix Coyotes radio broadcasts, you have heard them. In fact, that’s all they play during commercial breaks. If not, you can listen to some of them here. They are pretty funny in general. There aren’t enough hockey versions though. I aim to correct that. If you don’t know, italics are the singer dude.

Filed Under: Fun, Hockey

Real Men of Genius: Flames

April 15, 2007 By

I hope you are familiar with the Bud Light commercials called Real Men of Genius. If you listen to Phoenix Coyotes radio broadcasts, you have heard them. In fact, that’s all they play during commercial breaks. If not, you can listen to some of them here. They are pretty funny in general. There aren’t enough hockey versions though. I aim to correct that. If you don’t know, italics are the singer dude.


Jerseys and Hockey Love presents, Real Men of Genius.

Real Men of Genius.

Today we salute you, Mr. Calgary Flames Goaltender.

Mr. Calgary Flames Goaltender.

You dive, you flop, you kick out your legs and flail away, but all for nothing.

Why do I bother.

While your teammates run you over, you stand tall.

Get the hell off me.

5 on 4, 5 on 3, shot after shot, you make save after save while you team can’t score to save their lives.

Need a little scoring.

The fans, the other team, even your own defensemen can only stand and watch as you make another spectacular save.

Can I get a little help here.

So here’s to you, Mr. stopper of the shots. Even if you lose in the first round, at least you gave it your best.

Mr. Calgary Flames Goaltender.

Filed Under: Fun, Hockey

Open Letter to the Flames, Game 2

April 15, 2007 By

Dear Flames,

What the hell is wrong with you? You take penalty after penalty, Kiprusoff is having to play Tim Thomas in net, flailing back and forth to make second saves, and the defense is letting shot after shot get off. Wasn’t The Don (Cherry) saying how you never block shots, and even scolded you on air about it? You haven’t reacted very well to that.

Why do I care? Simple, I don’t like the Wings, and if it weren’t for you (and 60 piss poor up and down games at the beginning of the season), it would be the Avs playing today. And you know what? You know what I hope will kick you in the ass a little and get you to stop playing like a bunch of tools?

The Avs would have done better.

Yeah, I hope that hurt. I hope you are listening. There was nothing in this game you did not get out done in. And don’t start complaining about anything, nobody will listen. Answer with some goals for god sake.

Realize that there are people in this country that don’t get Versus. Your game is the only one they get for the day, or even the rest of the week. Show up for it.


Filed Under: Hockey, NHL

MaGoo Watch

April 12, 2007 By

If Mick McGeough doesn’t know where the bodies are burried, then he has to have pictures of Colin Campbell and Steve Walkom at the Breakers hotel in compromising positions.  It really is the only reason I can think of that he would be given any time in this years playoffs.  Aside from the bad calls he made last year in the playoffs, when he went all the way to the finals, some of the true bloopers he had this season should have at least thrown up red flags left and right.

In tonight’s game between the Flames and Wings, MaGoo made the first penalty call in a very animated fashion.  Later, he had a similarly flamboyant moment calling a trip.  At the best of times, it does not give the impression of professionalism.  At the worst, it makes him look like a fool.

In the USA Hockey Officials Handbooks, they talk about selling the call a ref makes.  What that means is a ref should make clear signals, in a confident manner, and with a minimum of fanfare.  Even if it is a questionable call, selling the call tells the players and coaches around you that that you are at least certain of your conviction.  It tells those around you that you are in control of yourself, and of the game.  It puts confidence in the ref.

MaGoo is not much of a salesman out there, unless it happens to be snake oil.  Do I dislike MaGoo?  No, I have nothing personal against him.  But when I find out that a game I am watching is being reffed by him, it’s like going to a game where your questionable backup goalie is the starter.  It may go fine, but you get a certain sense of dread throughout.  OR like watching an interview with Jeremy Roenick, waiting for him to embarrass himself. To include MaGoo in these playoffs, when they say that the reason certain refs get the opportunity to serve is performance based, is completely against the grain.  It makes no sense to hockey fans who know his name, and many know that name due to his performance, or lack thereof.

I want to watch a game he is reffing, start to finish, and only watch him.  Just to really see what his performance is like start to finish.  Painful? Sure, but the things I will do for art. 

So, for tonight’s game, we have MaGoo reffing, Ken Hitchcock in the studio, and the Wings beating up the Flames.  It’s like a bad car wreck, I just can’t stop watching, no mater how ugly it gets.

Filed Under: Uncategorized

Right As I Was Leaving…

April 11, 2007 By

Just as I was going to pick MegMegMeg up from work, Beezer pulls out this one:

“They had two good contagous shifts.”

And as I sit down to watch more, Turco takes a penalty.  Why did I leave?!?!?!

Filed Under: Uncategorized
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